My friend found them on the internet, I don't know how long she's been doing this....



“Anything I’ve ever wanted to do, I’ve done. Anyone I’ve ever wanted to be with, I’ve had.” — Calvin Klein


“Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall in an open sewer and die.” — Mel Brooks


“I consider myself influential, as opposed to manipulative.” — Richard Hatch


"How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?" asked Dorothy.
"I don't know. But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don't they?" answered the Scarecrow. — The Wizard of Oz


"Start the day with a smile and get it over with." - W. C. Fields


“There are two words I hate: Don’t and stop. Unless you use them together.” — Unknown


“Rule #1: I'm never wrong. Ruler #2: When in doubt, refer to Rule #1.” – Anonymous


“Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” - Phyllis Diller


“I never made a mistake in my life; at least, never one that I couldn't explain away afterwards.” – Unknown


"She's avoiding you, 'cause you suck." -Unknown


"My goal is ... to die someday. Mmhmm..." -Unknown


"Some of the worst sinners are the world's happiest people." -Unknown


"As I lay in bed last night, looking up at the stars and the moon, I thought to myself, 'Where the hell is my ceiling?" -Unknown


"Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." -Unknown


"A life? COOL! Where can I download one of those!" -Unknown


"One day we'll look back at this moment, laugh nervously, then change the subject." -Unknown


"I assume full responsibility for my actions, except the ones that are someone else's fault." -Unknown


"There are no stupid questions, just stupid people who ask questions." -Unknown


"I may not be very smart, but I can lift heavy things." -Unknown


"Randomness is the base of conversation." -Unknown


"I lost my mind a long time ago. Hm ... But, i haven't missed it yet." -Unknown


"Stupidity makes the world go round. Or lopsided, same difference." -Unknown


"My teacher said I was a walking abortion..." -Unknown


"I'm not crazy I’m just ... well, I’m not crazy!" -Unknown


"Some things children's eyes shouldn't see...your face is one of them." -Unknown


"Jesus loves you...but everyone else thinks you are an ass." -Unknown


"Everyone has a photographic memory...some just don't have any film." -Unknown


"I used to have a handle on life...but it broke off." -Unknown


"Some people just don't know how to drive...I call these people "Everybody But Me," -Unknown


"Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them." -Unknown


"Try not to let your mind wander...It is too small and fragile to be out by itself." -Unknown


(You are so lame

You always disappoint me

It's kinda like our running joke

But it's really not funny.

- Ani DiFranco, Dilate)


"Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special." — Chris Rock


“I really want to love somebody. I do. I just don't know if it's possible forever and ever.” — Jim Carrey


"See the happy moron - he doesn't give a damn. I wish I was a moron - by God! Perhaps I am!" — Unknown


“I don't recall the so-called devilish things I do. But there are considerable amounts.” - John Travolta


"A wise man once said, I don't know. Ask a girl." -Unknown


"Boys are like light bulbs. Some are brighter than others." -Unknown


"Please shut up, I'm trying to ignore you." -Unknown


"If I throw a stick, will you leave?" -Unknown


"Drop the chocolate and no one gets hurt." -Unknown


"Bratty but cute. So I'm worth it." -Unknown


"Marriage is when you find the perfect person to annoy for the rest of your life!" -Unknown


"You don't scare me, I have kids!" -Unknown


"My room, My mess, My business." -Unknown


"Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy." -Unknown


"Having your boyfriend or girlfriend break up with you and tell you "We can still be friends" is like having your pet die and your mom saying that you can still keep it. -Unknown


"Man fears the darkness, and so he scrapes away at the edges of it with fire." - Rei Ayanami, Evangelion


"There's three things in this universe I hate. Animals, children, and women with attitudes, why is it we have all three conviently located on our ship?" - Spike Spiegal, Bebop


"I'm not going out there to die... I'm going out there to find out if I'm really alive." - Spike, Bebop


"Its amazing how every time you open your mouth it proves you're an idiot." - Vegeta, DragonBall Z


"If I'd known I was going to die today, I wouldn't have done all that homework." - Tenchi, Tenchi Muyo


"Blackmail is such an ugly word, I prefer extortion...the ex makes it sound cool." - Bender, Futurama


"I became a teacher because...I REALLY LIKE HIGHSCHOOL GIRLS!!!" - Kimura Sensei, Azumanga Daioh


"Anchor . . . anchor . . . we need an anchor . . . say, Zel, how much do you weigh?" - Lina, Slayers


"Men ... they are such hopeless romantics." - Faye Valentine, Bebop


"Getting blown to pieces, is really gonna piss me off." - Yusuke from Yu Yu Hakusho


"Total slaughter, total slaughter. I won't leave a single man alive. Ladeedadeedide, genocide. Ladeedadeedud, an ocean of blood. Let's begin the killing time." - Vash's Song, Trigun


Professor: Behold! The internet! Leela: My god, its nothing but ads. – Futurama


"T...There is no way I could like that dirty-minded, blunderous, lying, perverted, deviant idiot!" - Naru Narusegawa, Love Hina


"Makimachi Misao does not give her name to strangers!" - Misao, Kenshin


"Oh. I'm just pissed off because they ate my stomach. That's all." - Alien9


"Mama used to say if you want you'll find a way, but mama never danced through fire showers." - Rain, Bebop OST


"I've seen that in manga a lot, but I've never seen it work." - Keitaro Urashima, Love Hina


"I've always had my suspicions you were no mere mortal. But I never imagined you actually... A cat... Wait! What the hell am I saying?! Where is that idiot?!!" - Nicholas D. Wolfwood, Trigun


"Have you ever gotten the thought that people are laughing at you not with you?" - Dexter, Hamtaro


"If you aren't remembered, then you never existed." - Serial Experiments Lain


"Don't worry. I used the back of my sword. Oh, it's double-sided. Sorry." - Zelgadis, Slayers


"Wow, look at that.........I wonder if I'm human..." - Alien9


"Boy who takes a bath while biting on a turtle...weird kid." - Sakata Kentarou, Love Hina


"Stupid Homo Sapiens." - Knives, Trigun


"And I'm known for my bullets never missing their mark. Especially if it's the heart of a beautiful lady. BANG!" - Vash, Trigun


"If we hit that bulls eye the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate." - Zapp Brannigan, Futurama


"I'd like a glass of water...pool water...that you've all been swimming in." - Kimura Sensei, Azumanga Daioh


"Quite possibly the chickenest looking chicken I’ve ever seen." - Gourry, Slayers


"I'll be all over her like a fly on a very seductive pile of manure." - Zapp Brannigan, Futurama


"I know! I'll bark our way out of this! Woof, woof!..." - Shigure from Fruits Basket, as a dog


"I am known as Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III. Don't hesitate to call." - Vash, Trigun


"I have not failed, I have found 10,000 ways that don't work." -Thomas Edison


"Never meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup." -Unknown
(found by Teito)